April 17, 2009

8:28 p.m.

In

Okay; you're almost not going to believe this, but this is exactly what happened.

It was a gorgeous day today, and I needed to do a load of laundry, so I got it together and went over to R&M's house. I thought Marc was around working on the Dynahoe, but I didn't see him. So I let one of the cats out, put the clothes in the washer and headed through the woods to visit House.

I got as far as the big, flat Sitting Rock in the woods behind House, and sat there listening to birds and contemplating the beautiful Spring day. It looked like that area had once been a clearing; small saplings populated this oval surrounded by much older trees. I thought how nice it might be to clear it again, and make a Secret Garden or a labyrinth or a ritual circle, or just a sitting place there. I was all alone, so I sang an old Judy Collins song from long ago, sang to the house and to the woods. It's called "Secret Gardens of the Heart." It's about old places that fall into ruin when the people leave, but you can still see the way they were in their brightest day, full of life and promise.

Then I walked, as usual, down to the house and looked at the big yard and imagined gardens there. Continuing in my usual pattern, I looked in every window, saying hello to each room and promising that I'd fix it up. I frequently ask House to let me in. Alas, I've tried every door and window multiple times, and it's locked up tight.

I got all the way around the house, ending up on the back "porch," the funky plywood shed thing that juts out from the back door. I stood on the poorly constructed cement floor of this overhang, looking out at the woods, listening to birds and distant traffic...

...and then I heard a soft "snick" behind me.

A little snicky, clicky sound, like something settling. I turned around and, on a hunch, walked up to the back door and tried it, as I have numerous times before.

It wasn't latched.

It was stuck because the bottom is swollen, and the doorknob was definitely locked because it wouldn't turn. But the tooth thingy wasn't in the latch.

With a little pushing, I opened it. I couldn't believe it; I was in.

Now, this house has settled a certain amount since being moved to its current location in the late 50s. It's entirely possible that settling had, in that moment, snicked the latch out of its little niche.

Or it's possible that one of the many spirits and saints I pray to gave it a little nudge.

Anyway, I got in, and spent the next hour and a half going through My House, looking in drawers, examining old photographs, taking a closer look at walls that have buckled or cracked and doors that need replacing. I found a gorgeous antique Singer treadle sewing machine in the basement, the kind that folds into the table, and another antique electric one upstairs in a case. I found old makeup from his wife that died a long time ago. (Why would he keep her makeup?) I found the golf trophies of the son who committed suicide, and also his graduation program. He was only a year older than I am. I also found the third working fireplace mentioned on the 1986 assessment paper! It's in the BASEMENT. There is a working fireplace in the basement. That's pretty good, actually; one could install a wood stove there.

My house let me in.

I put everything back where I found it, except a few things I took out of the house and can replace. I wanted Rose and Marc to see some of these photos, and I also found the assessor's folder from 1958, with a drawn copy of a map of the whole property, and some pictures of the house from that time. It was worth some $37,000 then, and said to be in excellent condition. This was among some things placed on a radiator by the front door, so I'm assuming the son wants to keep them. I'll copy the documents and replace it later this weekend.

I put a Reiki healing symbol in every room and hallway.

The house is feeling better. This is maybe weird to say, but I deal with healing energies and I feel like the house, or the spirits in the house, or the energy around the house, is responding to me. There is a powerful mojo going on here. The Universe is organizing itself in profound ways. Something is going "snick" and a door is about to open. Maybe it's already open.