October 29, 2005

9:56 a.m.

Party Eve, Party Day

From Friday, Oct. 28th

I'm sitting in a big presentation room in the JFK conference and fitness center in Edison, NJ, where we just played three songs during a break between speakers. This is a music therapy conference, for which we got booked because Carol is a certified music therapist. She doesn't currently do that kind of work because the band is full time, but she's a great presence here and they were somehow thrilled that we agreed to play. We spent up til the final half hour deciding what three songs to play -- it was highly ludicrous -- and then changed one on the fly anyway. The decision was between doing our own material, which we prefer, or the "Old Favorites" that are usually played at the institutional gigs this organization sponsors. It was fine; people listened, laughed. One guy came right up and sat on the steps to the stage so he could hear better. My callouses have softened. We haven't played a whole lot lately. But my mind is elsewhere right now -- the books I'm reading now are strongly informing my perception of reality and its possibilities. I'm getting really excited about the next few years and I don't even know why. I just know that I'll be learning amazing things and evolving to a place of greater personal power. I see reversal of fears, and letting go of baggage. I see unprecedented growth and profound evolution.

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Chris and I have been silently cutting up back here during the two-hour panel. It's frighteningly reminiscent of most of my high school career. Passing notes, drawing silly pictures, having to make absolutely no noise laughing because we're sitting at a big round table with a couple of people we don't know -- who, of course, are trying to listen to people speaking about the music products industry and the health care industry. Carol was asked to be on this panel but had reservations about whether she'd have anything to contribute, as primarily a performing artist. She said one thing early on in response to a direct question, but I'm sure she feels out of place among the other six panelists who are administrators of various types.

By the way, this whole thing is being filmed, and our sound check may be on the Channel 7 news.

But I think the pervading feeling I have right now is glee. After three more songs this evening, we'll be done working. I'll get home late, and tomorrow (Saturday) Rose and Mike are coming for dinner. I have some ideas for the menu, which currently includes Skewered Eyeballs (lychee nuts stuffed with grapes or something, secured with a toothpick); Maggots & Crackers (goat cheese crumbles -- the longish, extruded-looking ones); Candy Corn Chowder (cream of squash and apple soup); and Orange Mummy-lade Chicken. In addition to this spectacular repast, I am going to stuff an effigy of myself and lay it to rest on the Reiki table with a headstone describing some audacious and witty form of demise. I was pondering what to do for a head, and I decided to take a digital photo of my face, in an expression of sudden death, then print it more or less life sized and affix it to a pillow. I also have some really good vampire teeth somewher. Hey! I just remembered, Dar gave me a fart machine years ago. I'll plant it in the effigy, har!

As you can see, I have a LOT to do tomorrow. Haven't even gone grocery shopping yet. Rose said she got some more decorations at the dollar store and will bring them along. Be assured, there will be no oversized, blow-up pumpkins or frankensteins at this event. However, I may hang a homemade ghostie on the stairs.

Then, Sunday, Dar and I go to Salem.

...Forty more minutes of this panel, then another hour and a half to wait before the final one-hour show. Five or six artists each doing 10 minutes, and we're last, and then we get to lead a group-sing of "If I Had a Hammer." (I know, I know.) Afterward there's a reception at which we'll need to make an appearance. We might get out by 8. Carol thinks they'll hand us checks (as opposed to mailing them later) and I stand to make maybe $240 for my trouble today. And we came in one car, so I didn't even have to drive. Wheeeee!

We stayed with friends of Carol's last night after taping a radio appearance at WFUV in New York City. This woman has a baby just over a year old. Carol, who has opted not to have kids, still has a real need to nurture, and she was in heaven holding and playing with the baby. It's so funny -- I didn't even want to touch the wee cute thing. I kept thinking of how germy she must be. We talked later about how chaotic it is to be caring for a bairn. The house was a wreck. No time to clean. This woman is a massage therapist and Reiki practitioner too, but she hasn't had time to work since she got pregnant. It reminded me of why I never had the desire to raise children. There have been just a handful of things that were clear to me in this life, and that was one of them.

Always sing.
Don't have kids.
Develop a rich inner life.
Listen and observe, but if you say something, make it important.
If you have a bad hair day, wear a fabulous hat.
Don't go too long without chocolate.



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Saturday

And now, I'm home and I really must get going on this party.