June 04, 2008

7:53 p.m.

Oatmeal for Supper

Well, this day turned out slightly differently from what I expected. I had an appointment about half an hour away in the afternoon, so puttered around here from early morning when I'd risen, including rearranging the living room so that there's more room in the middle, doing some Reiki, and finally working out a little on the Total Gym. It was drizzly all day so no hiking. I created and sent the band newsletter, had a lunch about which there was nothing strange at all, and about half an hour before I had to leave, my energy just crashed.

I lay on the living room floor (now that there was room) for a little while, just uncomfortable enough so that I wouldn't fall asleep and miss my appointment. Finally I left.

I'd messaged Marc to see if I could stop by the house and check out a sort of big copper basin-thingy that Carol and I might have used for the ceremony, and he told me where it was outside. So after my appointment I drove to the house, let the crying cat inside, and peeked through some driveway debris to find the basin. It's very cool and I can't imagine what it was made for, but it's so tarnished it's black, except where it's got sort of fluffy white mossy stuff on it. It didn't look easily cleanable so I decided against it for now.

After a couple more errands I went home, and by the time I got here I was in crash mode again. It was a few hours since lunch but no appetite, no energy, vague indescribable feelings of ick. I tried to watch something on the computer, lost interest in five minutes, and went to bed, where I stayed for a couple of hours, not quite napping but not in this world.

I had a bit of this on Monday too. I figure I'm either fighting something off or I've been (mentally anyway) pushing myself too hard and I really need to LET GO of some things. Everything in the world doesn't have to get done before I leave in two weeks. It's such a gross feeling, though; it borders on anxiety, but then I still suspect it's some physical imbalance, something digestive maybe, but I can't pin it down.

Anyway, we record again tomorrow and the rescheduled school show is Friday, for which I will have to get up at 4:00am latest. Getting up at 4:00am. Now THAT makes me feel sick.

I think I'll go graze for something simple to eat, like oatmeal.