March 05, 2004

12:11 a.m.

Whistlin' Pixie

Three movies in one day is possibly more than I saw all last year.

Dinner was great, the movies were fun, we exchanged little gifts. It was a lovely day, yet I'm left once again with the sad feeling that he still wants more than I can give him, but will never say it out loud. Dear, dear friend Dar. Whatever will become of us?

Taxes tomorrow. Must do the rest of the prep. CD sales, mileage, inventory, and a call to the Dept. of Defense to find out why they sent me a 1099 for a check I didn't get. Much niggly, un-fun stuff to do. I do not think that's what is making me sad tonight.

My dyke pastor friend Shayna says the place of not-knowing is a good place to be. "That is where God has the space She needs to come in and weave Her magic." I wish Shayna would come down from Vermont tonight and hold my hand.

Maybe I can override the Don't Go to Bed Pixie and slip under the covers before she notices tonight.